bronze statue of
Vajrasattva, signifying that we will be able to uphold Guru Lau's lineages,
and he encouraged us to always keep our samayas pure and clean. Rinpoche
even made a remark to me that my relationship to him now is just like
the relationship of Guru Lau to Kyabje Dudjom Rinpoche II. For this
very special relationship, I will treasure it, not only for this life
but forever! At the same time, we would like to express our utmost appreciation
for Rinpoche's consort Sangyum Kusho Kamala and her daughter Ms. Saraswati
for their help in translating for us during our visits to Rinpoche.
Photo 1.63 Kyabje
Chadral Rinpoche, Kyabje Dudjom Rinpoche II (centre) and Kyabje
Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche.
During a very difficult and dark time when I felt helpless, it is Kyabje
Chadral Rinpoche who compassionately supported and blessed me. I am
most grateful for his kindness of which I will never be able to repay.
Indeed, my gratitude and appreciation of him is beyond words, and he
is my Protector and Lord of Refuge! I truly believe that this is due
to the merits of Guru Lau, that he personally blessed me and directed
me to Rinpoche. In order to repay the kindness of both Guru Lau and
Kyabje Chadral Rinpoche, I vow that I will try my very best in this
life to help Kyabje Dudjom Yangsi Rinpoche in whatever way I can, by
spreading the Nyingma teachings in the world. In fact, Kyabje Chadral
Rinpoche is now one of my beloved Tsawai Lamas, and together with Kyabje
Dudjom Rinpoche and Guru Lau, they are all the same, three in one!
I firmly believe that this is surely the only way that I can repay the
great kindness and merits of these three beloved Tsawai Lamas of mine.
Realizing how lowly I am in terms of both widsom and merit, I will not
be able to have any hope of the slightest attainment without the great
blessings of these three Great Masters! Even though Kyabje Chadral Rinpoche
has so kindly written a letter of authorization allowing me to help
propagate the Holy Dharma, I dare not to become others' teacher simply
because I need to consolidate on my own practice. It is only until the
time when both Rinpoche and myself feel that it is, indeed, suitable
that I will consider this possibility.
Photo 1.55 Ms.
Saraswati (left), Yeshe Thaye (middle) and Sangyum Kusho Kamala
Even though I have to start everything from scratch, in comparison with
what Guru Lau had so painstakingly done before, it is only a fraction
of a million. Hence, if there is any slight accomplishment, this is
due to the blessings and protection of Guru Lau. I further believe that
all those difficulties and obstacles that I have gone through were the
"blessings of the unfavourable circumstances" that Guru Lau had particularly
trained me to face. I am now calling the lama from afar, and thus sincerely
pray that Ven. Lama Sonam Chokyi Gyaltsan (Guru Lau Yui-che) will swiftly
be reborn in order to turn the Dharma Wheel again. To this very day,
I long for it!
If there are any wrongdoings on my part, or transgressions of discipline
or broken samayas, such that it will disappoint the great expectations
that my three beloved Tsawai Lamas have of me, I will have to confess
that these are all due to my own ignorance and incapability. Thus I
have to bear the responsibility! I pray to my three beloved Tsawai Lamas
that they will forgive me for what I do wrong, and that they will not
forsake me, now and in the future. If there are any slight merits that
I may have, these are definitely due to the merits and blessings of
my three beloved Tsawai Lamas.
I vow to dedicate all merits, if any, to my three beloved Tsawai Lamas,
as well as to all our motherly sentient beings ! Particularly, I earnestly
pray, from the depths of my heart, for the health and longevity of both
Kyabje Chadral Rinpoche and Kyabje Dudjom Yangsi Rinpoche, and for the
swift rebirth of Guru Lau, so that these three Great Masters can continue
to uphold the Victory Banners in all directions, and to turn the unsurpassed
Wheel of the Holy Dharma for the benefits of all our motherly sentient
beings, as limitless as the sky!